Period sex has long been taboo—even in communities that are typically sex-positive. The stigma around period sex comes from long-held misogynistic beliefs about people who have periods. Since they were part of the reproductive cycle for people with vaginas, periods were often thought of as gross and shameful. Menstruating is an amazing part of the circle of life, so below are some ideas for how to make period sex hot.
Why Period Sex Is So Fun
Period sex is great—and many people believe it’s even better than sex during other parts of your cycle. For one, menstrual blood can act as a lubricant, which is sometimes much needed for people who are naturally dryer or are on medications that make them produce less natural lubricant. This means sex can feel even better and is less likely to cause dryness-related pain than sex at other times of the month.
Next, many people with vulvas feel extra turned on during their period. Not everyone fits into this category—some people don’t feel very sexy while menstruating. But if you notice your libido getting a boost during your period—you should take advantage of it.
Plus, having sex on your period can feel sexually empowering. People who were raised as girls may have internalized messages about periods being gross and shameful. Having sex on your period can help you realize that you’re sexy and desirable no matter where you are on your cycle.
Hot Period Sex Tips
Don’t hesitate to use lube! Even though you have some extra lubrication, you may still want to have some extra slipperiness. Grab something unscented that’s body-safe. If you’re using condoms or toys, check to ensure that you’re using a compatible lube. Here’s a quick cheat sheet: don’t use oil-based lubes with condoms, and don’t use silicone lube with silicone toys. Water-based lube is the safest option.
Keep in mind that you can still get pregnant on your period, so family planning is crucial. The chances are slightly lower while you’re on your period, but there is still a chance, so continue to use protection if you aren’t interested in becoming pregnant immediately.
You can also contract an STI while having period sex. STIs are far more treatable now than ever before, but it’s always essential to know your and your partner’s statuses before hopping into bed together.
Next, don’t use a tampon or other blood-collecting device if you’ll be having penetrative sex. This can be uncomfortable. It’s far better to talk to your partner beforehand and ensure that they’re okay with period blood so that you don’t feel like you need to lessen the amount of blood flow occurring during sex.
Lastly, for easy cleanup, try having period sex in the shower. That way, there’s no cleanup. If you’re not into shower sex, put down a towel that you don’t care about staining.
Talking to Your Partner about Period Sex
If you grew up internalizing a lot of shame about your menstrual cycle, it might feel uncomfortable to let your partner know that you’re interested in trying period sex. However, don’t let this sex-negative messaging stop you! You’ll miss out on a lot of connection, intimacy, and orgasms if you never have sex during your period.
It’s a good idea to talk to your partner outside of the bedroom and not when you’re about to have sex. This keeps the pressure off the conversation. If your partner reacts negatively, don’t take it personally. They have internalized a lot of negative ideas about periods. But keep in mind that if you’re interested in period sex, your partner’s lack of interest may signify that you’re not sexually compatible. And if they react with disgust, that’s a red flag that they have hang-ups about people with vulvas.
More Sex Tips
Want more ideas about how to have excellent period sex? Contact me for a free consultation, and I can help you upgrade your sex life.
Bio: Dr. Nazanin Moali is a clinical psychologist and sex therapist in the Los Angeles area. She works with various individuals to understand and improve their sexuality. Dr. Moali conducts personal consultation sessions in her Torrance and Hermosa Beach offices, or via a secure, online video-counseling platform. Click here to take the sex quiz for women.