Getting Back to Great Sex After Trauma
Sexual trauma is a common—yet isolating—occurrence. When traumatic sexual experiences interfere with your sex life, it can diminish the satisfaction that you feel. Working through this to reprioritize your pleasure can be difficult, but it is rewarding. Bodily...
Body Shaming Within Relationships: What to Do When Your Partner Has a Problem With Your Body
We All Want to Be Wanted “I want you to want me,” sang the '70s band Cheap Trick. We all want to be wanted, to be desired for the person we are and for the body we have. There’s nothing silly or shallow about that - chemistry is built on a mutual back-and-forth...
How to Use Your Sexual Fantasies to Improve Your Sex Life
Monogamy is a tricky thing, and in most cases, that’s because people define it very differently. Many clients come into couples’ therapy worried because they found that their partner has fantasies about someone else, and they want to find out what this means for their...
When Pills Help Male Sexual Dysfunction, and When They Don’t
Men who have trouble maintaining erections have likely heard about the option of taking medication to help with the problem—but meds only help in certain scenarios. Know that, if you’re wondering whether or not you have erectile dysfunction, you’re not alone. Finding...
Cracking the Code of Female Desire, Arousal, and Orgasm
Women and men take very different paths toward orgasm. Historically, the female orgasm has been through the wringer. Doctors used to debate whether or not women could even have an orgasm, and then people thought that the female orgasm was necessary for procreation....
Understanding Sexual Fantasies and Their Place in Your Relationship
Think about your most vivid, enticing sexual fantasy—you might be able to explain where it came from and precisely why you find it so erotic. But, think about your strangest fantasy—can you say the same thing? Your brain is a sophisticated and intricate entity, and...
BDSM: A Healthy Part of Your Self-Care Routine
BDSM used to be stigmatized as something that damaged folks engaged in, and was, in general, considered a deviant kind of sexuality. For those who are unfamiliar, BDSM stands for bondage, discipline, sadism, and masochism. BDSM culture covers a broad spectrum of...
The Intersection of Self-Image and Sexuality
People who grow up without comprehensive sex education can have trouble understanding sex—and this problem manifests in many different ways. Even those who did get a good baseline sex education in all likelihood learned primarily about heterosexual sex and how to...
Pandemic Sex: How to Navigate It Safely
The new coronavirus that causes COVID-19 has swept around the world, closing down entire countries, overwhelming health care systems, and making its way into our bedrooms. Feeling lonely and a bit depressed during this isolating, frightening time is normal. Sex is a...
How to Be a Better Flirt
Just like there’s a fine line between friendship and romance, there’s also a fine line between casual chitchat and flirting. Knowing whether or not someone is flirting with you can be difficult, and so is upgrading a friendly convo to letting someone know you’re...
Having a Healthy Relationship Can Lead to Better Sex
Sometimes the obstacles to having a great sex life lie outside of the bedroom. Passionate sex may come easily early on in relationships, but creating long-term arousal and excitement is more challenging. Try the below tips to have a more satisfying, healthy...
4 Tips for Talking With Your Kids About Sex
Having “the talk” with your kids is something that many parents dread as much as kids do—but a lot of times, this is because the parents don’t have any solid guidance on how to make the conversation positive rather than awkward. Talking to your kids about sex early...
3 Steps Toward Redefining Your Sex Life
Photo by Dainis Graveris on SexualAlpha Some people consider sex a primal activity that should be intuitive, natural, and shouldn’t need a lot of discussion. But when you rely on instinct rather than critical thinking in your sex life, it’s easy to fall prey...
Moving From Toxic Masculinity to Healthy Masculinity
Though men and women experience many similar sexuality-related issues, the fact is that our society treats the genders differently. Parents are steered toward raising boys distinctly from girls, and interactions, toys, hobbies, and even jobs are still affected by...
Getting Rid of Your Sexual Inhibitions
There’s one thing that separates healthy, active, and continuously fulfilling sex lives from the rest, and that’s communication. Partners who can easily and frequently talk with each other about their subjective experiences when they have sex together can overcome...
What Mindfulness Looks Like in the Bedroom
Vulnerability and authenticity: you may have heard of them in your therapist’s office, but have you brought them up in your bedroom? It’s essential to do so, especially if you’re in a long-term relationship with your partner. The thing is, a lot of people think that...
Sexual Addiction, Boundaries, and Out of Control Behavior
A common issue brought up by my clients is whether or not their partner is exhibiting signs of sexual addiction or out of control sexual behavior. But the definition of truly out of control sexual behavior is not as broad as some may feel it should be. In the...
Becoming a Sexual Chemist
Most everyone grows up not having a perfect childhood. Even well-meaning parents, at some point, wound their children or give them a poor example of what a loving relationship looks like. Children who grew up in cold, unsympathetic households may experience hurt or...
Sex and Technology: How the Internet Can Affect Your Relationship
There’s no escaping the effect of technology on sex. Technology’s impact on sexuality has brought about both positives and negatives, and it has a lot more manifestations in our daily lives and relationships than just pornography. Couples can bond sexually from a...
Turning On the Female Body – Why Does It Seem so Hard (No Pun Intended) and How Can We Get There Easier?
Culturally, we have certain ideas about sex that are, for lack of a better term, inaccurate. Whether we can blame the media, male-dominated pornography or living in a patriarchal culture (or all of the above), its time to face the facts: our model of how sexuality is...